Underwater experience.

Can't be bothered to type..

But for my precious, sweet lil' followers..

I will ;)

Okay so..

Hmm As most of you all already know..

I went to Pulau Tioman for a diving courses with my two big sisters and my 18 years old cousins.

Yes, there were just 4 of us. No guys. NO PARENTS.

My sis, Ateeyqa drove us to Mersing, Johor.

And we slept there for a night and on the next morning. We went to the jetty for a 3-days-trip to Tioman Island.

Now there are good thing and awful thing about this trip.

Good thing, I finally got my temporary certification for diving and getting the real one after I do the theory exams soon :)) Okay for your information. DIVING IS FUCKING COOL. It's like you are flying in the air but instead, its water! Swimming with all those creatures down under is amazing. Its just so beautiful and its like Im entering a new damn world. Its really fun. But you have to pass a really awful experiences before you enjoy it. for example, boat diving. Blaghhh. I HATE boat diving. It makes me puke and makes my brain goes so friggin dizzy. But you will get used to it after sometimes..

Awful thing, the resort. I cant even barely call it a resort. Its like an gorilla's poop place.

Damn. there's no towel, no hot water, no glass, no fan, no mirror, no chair, no BIN, no TV. 

There's NOTHING in the room except for bed and a toilet bowl. WORST hotel ever.

So yeah that's all I guess..

We didn't took much pictures cause apparently the diving class took a lot of time..

And I'm always wet like all the time.

But of course there is some pictures that we took on the last 2 days.

Oh and there's also pictures of me in the water, diving but the pics is with this woman.

I will take the pictures from her when I meet her soon.

So i will upload all the pics when I got my pictures in the water..

Till then, Booobye xD

What Are Words?

I'm tired of people saying things to me that they don't actually mean.
Don't tell me you love me when you don't mean it.
Don't promise me if you are going to break it.
Don't tell me you care about me when you're never there when I need you.
Just be honest to me.


A song dedicated to all the people outside there that feels the same way like me.

I love you so much Chris Medina.
I hope one day I'll get a husband like him.

Stay strong <3

The reality.

Hey guys..
Hmm, if you've read my previous post..
Alhamdulillah, my eyes is getting much more better :)

Okay, so the reality.
What do you expect of the reality?
Do u expect that your parents will pay your bills when you're 20 years old?
Do u expect that you can easily go into a high level overseas university?
Do u expect this whole world is all full filled with good things?
Okay I know we should think positively.
I know that.
But sometimes you just have to look at the other side of the world.
The bad side of it.
What is happening to this world?
It's a disaster.
There's lots of 16 years old teenagers pregnant,
Every single minute in this world, there will at least be one human that commit suicide.
Child Abuse.
Sexual Harassment.
Homeless people.
Children that is dying for food.
And many many more.


So my point here is.. You should always feel grateful for every single things that happened or will happen in your life.
Think about other people that is craving for food out there at Africa.
You should always feel grateful cause you eat everyday.
You drink everyday.
You showers everyday.
You have a great mom that at least buy foods for your everyday life.
You have a great dad that care for your family.
You have a house where you can sleep comfortably.
You have a maid.
You have mobile phone.
You have TV.
You get pocket money everyday for school.
You GO TO SCHOOL.
Your mom buy your books for school.
You should feel very grateful of all this stuff.
90% of teenagers now days never feels grateful.
Why?
Because they want more than what they have.
They want hundreds of money for pocket money.
They want to have their own room because they deserve 'privacy'.
They want to buy tons of clothes just to take pictures and put it on facebook.
They want to buy expensive electronics stuff.
They hate their mom cause apparently, they say that their mom doesn't respect their ''privacy'' or their mom is asking too much favor.
They want an amazing phone so that their friends will love them or get jealous of them.

They hate their dad cause he always get mad at them or tell them to study.

They hate their maids because they thinks that she is so freaking lazy but instead, your maid is working very hard to clean your WHOLE house. Don't ever consider your maid as a slave or a robot because they are normal humans like you. They get tired after some times and they sleep.

Well, yes i'm 12 years old but i think very maturely.
I feel grateful for my life even though my life is very complicated in such a way.
But I still feel very thankful to Allah for giving me a wonderful life.
For giving me a MOM.
For giving me a DAD.
For giving me food to eat everyday.

I have lots more things that I'm grateful with.
But the most that I'm happy with,
I have a mom, a dad, a family.
There's millions of kid out there that is homeless, that has no parents, that has no family.
And look at you. You're mad at your mom because she doesn't give you money.
You're mad at your dad for telling you to finish your homeworks
You get mad at your brothers/sisters for changing the channels when you're watching TV.
While all the kids that is homeless, orphans, they are crying everyday to have their mom and dad back.
They would do anything to get their mom back.
But it's too late.
There's nothing you can do when a human is passed away.
So take care of your mom and dad starting from now on.
Love them more than you love your friends.
Because they are the one who care for you since you were born.
They are the one who pay money for your school.
They are the one that support you no matter what.
Well if they don't, they just think that it doesn't suit you, they have other good plans.
Sometimes you just have to say yes to them.
Because you never knows how they feel when you make them sad.
You don't wanna know.
Maybe they look normal, happy.
But in the side.. You don't wanna know.

Death and Sorrow

i just received a bad news, and the bad news is, there's three of them.
first one, my uncle had been diagnosed having cancer..
two cancer at one time. one in brain, and one in lung.
the news is shocking. it made me think a lot about life and death again.

i couldn't even imagine how my cousins would live without their dad.
the doctor estimated that he would probably live for just another 6-12 months.


oh kay.. second news, our family has a cancer GENETIC.
which means that anyone from my family can just get cancer at any time.
my grandma, used to have a cancer rahim.
but then her family sent her to therapies, bought lots of herbal medicine and yeah, stuff like that..
then, alhamdullilah with Allah's permission, it's getting much better now.
second people in my family, my mom's cousin.
she has a breast cancer which is the most common cancer for women in the world.
whoah, that really freaks me out.
there's a LOT more people in my family that has got cancer.
but i can't really list them all.


so the third and the last bad news is
i got conjunctivitis.
damn it burn
my eyes is all runny and itchy and its freaking red.
and guess what causes that?
eyeliner.
my plumber in my eyes is stucked with eyeliner.
and i have to put eye antibiotic drops in my eye every single hours to get the thing out of my eye.
now, what i'm scared of is..
it's getting worse.
it's going to my another eye.
and what im freaking freaking out is..
who knows i got an EYE CANCER?


God i really have to start to think positively.


So now, the good new is,
my mom made an eye appointment for me on this monday.
and our family has agreed to eat salad everyday and eat fruits as our 'snacks'
so like every time we are hungry.
we can't eat chips and junk foods.
instead, we have to eat fruits and oats or craker oats or grains biscuits.